Have you ever known a backstabber? Chances are, you probably have no idea as backstabbers (aka Traitors like Mr. Arnold) are notorious manipulators. They gain your trust and indulge you with their great ability to listen and understand your plight, whatever it may be. They are everyone's best friend.
While out in the real world, I think most of us are aware of these beings. Most people (with even a small amount of street smarts) can detect a phony a mile away, especially in a social setting. These backstabbers are not as harmful, imo. However, be aware of the corporate backstabber for they are the most cunning backstabbers of all.
I recently left a company that was both horrendous and hedonistic. Yes, I just wrote hedonistic.
I had two great assistants that I treated very well. I am not a micromanager. I am not a stickler for minute details like coming in late once in awhile. I think I'm pretty lenient. All I expect of people that report to me is to do their job to the best of their abilities. Finish their projects on time and avoid gossiping with other departments. I don't know, maybe that doesn't make for good manager material but I respect every single person that I have ever worked with and for.
Anyway, one of my former assistants has been talking smack about me since I left. This was the same woman that was encouraging me to quit because she witnessed first hand the abuse my VP placed upon me. She was kind, sweet, empathetic and a very good worker. She is the ultimate backstabber.
Since learning of her betrayal, I started to think about how it must feel to live life as a backstabber. Are they able to sleep at night? Are they able to look at themselves in the mirror? Do they even have close friends? Are they straight up with anyone in their lives?
The only positive thing that has come out of all of this is that I will be more aware of the corporate backstabber in the future. You can usually spot them at the water cooler gossiping about the person they just had lunch with.
Benedict Arnold
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Benedict Arnold V (January 14, 1741 [O.S. January 3, 1740][1][2] – June 14, 1801) originally fought for American independence from the British Empire as a general in the Continental Army during the American Revolutionary War until he obtained command of the American fort at West Point, New York and, switching sides, plotted unsuccessfully to surrender it to the British.
Arnold was considered by many to be the best general and most accomplished leader in the Continental Army. In fact, without Arnold's earlier contributions to the American cause, the American Revolution might well have been lost; but after he switched sides, his name, like those of several other prominent traitors throughout history, has become a byword for treason in the United States.[3][4]
Another Christmas and New Year's have passed and I'm left wondering what's it all for. When I say 'all' I mean the entire holiday season. Are we still under the impression that we are celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ? Are we still living under the illusion that as soon as the year goes up, things in our life will get a whole lot better?
The great thing about New Year's resolutions is that most people know they will fail at them so they don't look down on others when they fail at theirs. ;)
My New Year's resolution is to lose weight. Original, right?
Just before Christmas I had my yearly physical. I knew I would get a lecture from my Doc about my weight but I wasn't prepared to hear what she had to say. She used the 'O' word on me. Yes, obese. There! I wrote it! Not only did she use the 'O' word, she also politely handed me a voucher for a Weight Watchers membership. Oh, did I mention that my Doc is about 110 pounds? I pictured myself shoving donuts down her throat. That was fun.
Anyway, I know I'm fat but I didn't think I was obese. Afterall, isn't obese a word to describe those fat people that are at least 100 pounds overweight living naked in their beds? Well, I'm wrong.
According to our BMI (a simple and widely used method for estimating body fat which calculates your weight by your height) below are the classifactions of 'fatism':
A BMI less than 18.5 is underweight
A BMI of 18.5–24.9 is normal weight
A BMI of 25.0–29.9 is overweight (this is where I am but I'm creeping up to the next level!)
A BMI of 30.0–39.9 is obese
A BMI of 40.0 or higher is severely (or morbidly) obese
A BMI of 35.0 or higher in the presence of at least one other significant comorbidity is also classified by some bodies as morbid obesity (this is where the naked people living in their beds fit)
It's funny how some people (like me) struggle with food their whole lives while others couldn't care less about food. They are the morons that stay thin forever without having to workout or cut out the good stuff. I'm sure we all have had a friend or family member in our lives that are like one of these skinny assholes.
I once had a roomate that was tall, skinny, blonde and stupid--the guys loved her. She could eat and eat and eat and didn't gain an ounce. She wasn't bulimic either. Trust me, I watched her closely as I was completely mesmerized by her eating (not to mention drinking) habits. Now, that was a skinny asshole.
Below is a photo of us (circa 1996) from the Sears portrait studio.
Since Labour Day weekend, work has been complete mayhem.
I work for a boss that gives me zero direction, too many responsibilities and only two assistants. The amount of work piled on me could fill the day of at least three managers. I'm starting to feel the pain. I'm starting to come to the scary conclusion that I am inviting these kinds of people into my life. Why am I like a magnet for any job that requires I give my life over to complete a work week? It's stupid and I feel stupid, too.
I'm sure there are more than a few of you out there that knows how it feels to have work piled on you because you're a hard worker and you just get things done. Therefore, most managers will treat you like a donkey while the person sitting next to you (the moron with the big degree) has fewer responsibilities with a bigger salary. Sound familiar? Welcome to the corporate world. It's going to be a bumpy ride.
I'm still trying my best to figure out why I work so hard. Why do I care so much? Why can't I be like Dick or Jane and leave the office promptly at 5pm everyday--regardless of unfinished projects sitting on my desk?
I always come back to the Only Child Sydrome. I'm an only child and always felt the need to be the best--at anything and everything. I felt that my parents only had one chance to be proud of their child. I couldn't screw things up and just wait until a younger sibling came along to make them happy. I couldn't sit back and relax because an older sibling was a Noble Prize Winner or a star athlete. Nope--all the pressure to perform was on me at all times.
I wish I new more only children--there should be a support group for us!
It's now August 21st and I just want to know where the time went.
I've been so busy this past month, I can barely think straight--too much going on in my head.
Work is going well, for the most part. Things are quite hectic as we are opening new stores all over the place with not a lot of turnaround time.
Being in retail means I must wear ten different hats everyday--something I dislike but not enough to get out of the industry entirely. I guess I'm a masochist.
I haven't done much writing lately which makes me feel anxious and guilty. I feel like I'm neglecting my child or something. The good news is I gave some of my work to my 'uber editor' and friend, Peter to take a look at. I told him to be brutally honest and I know he will as that's why I chose him in the first place.
Actually, out of all my friends, he's the only one that can understand what it means to feel the need to write.
I think it's important to surround yourself with friends that have similar interests, even if it's only one friend--that's better than nothing. Writing has a tendency to make you feel isolated and misunderstood as a lot of time is spent alone with your thoughts.
When I lived in New York, my friend Daniel was my art gallery/museum friend, Mark was my writing friend, Marianna was my getting wasted friend, Judy and Cara were my concert-going friends, etc., etc....
In my opinion, this is the best way to live a balanced life. Oh, and coffee...can't forget the coffee--and it goes so well with friends!!!
Motivation has never been easy for me.
I'm one of those people that require instant gratification--I hate waiting for anything therefore I lack the motivation gene. If there is such a thing.
Since I've started working again (it's been four months already!) I find that I am losing my motivation to write. Truth be told, I haven't worked on my novel in about three months. It's bugging me. I can't seem to set aside the time to write. The problem is I feel so close to finishing the damn thing yet so far. When I think about all the editing it's going to need, I cringe. See what I mean? It's all about instant gratification. I want it all now. It's alarming.
It's so hard to focus on what you really love to do when all you can think about is work. My job is taking over my life again and I don't know how to stop it. I don't want to become my career again. I want to be me.
I love what I'm doing now but I have to admit that it is pretty stressfull. Not only am I managing categories and a sixty million dollar budget, I am also managing people. Yes, people. The most difficult 'things' to manage.
I guess the key to happiness really is balance. Too much work and not enough play will make you miserable. Too little work and too much play doesn't pay the bills therefore, you're miserable again.
Ok, I've gotten that all off my chest. Now, I'll go listen to Madonna. She always knows what to say.
I never wanted to be a cheerleader.
Remember high school when all the girls were just crazy about the whole cheerleading thing? Well, I was not one of them. I like to think of myself as an orginal, a pioneer if you will. I hated following. I hate being told that I had to do something just because every other girl was doing it. Most of all, I would not appreciate being told "take one for the squad!".
So, I finally figured out what Girl Power really means. I finally figured out what it was that drove all those hormonal girls in high school over the edge when the topic of cheerleading came up: it has a lot to do with 'The Power Within'. Most of the men out there think it's just because girls want to show them how cute they are but I think cheerleading is more for the girls benefit than it is the boys. We just want them to think it's all about them, right girls?
Now, I'm not exactly sure what 'the power within' really is and where it comes from. All I know is, I have 'the power'--it just took a very long time to find it and I didn't need a cheerleading outfit to locate it.
I attended The Power Within Conference this past Monday and was pleasantly surprised--I actually enjoyed the speeches about Girl Power.
http://www.powerwithin.com/They had a great lineup of speakers this year:
Ariana Huffington
Mia Farrow
Kelly Armstrong (Lance's Mom)
Hilary Swank
Dr. Antonia Coello Novello (my favourite speaker)
Cassie Campbell
Terry Savage
Jessica Holmes (she was the hostess)
Check out their website and if you ever get the chance to attend, do it. It's well worth it. You come out of there feeling like you can build a house with your bare hands! Or, change your own damn flat tire!
My favouirte speaker was Dr. Novello (the former Surgeon General of the USA) because you could see and feel the power in her belly. She had the kind of presence and power most of us only dream of having. I wish I could speak as well as she does--I was quite jealous.
See, typical woman! Jealously rules over everything.
I knew I was a hypochondriac when I went to the emergency room one day, thinking I was going to have a stroke when all I really had was a pulled muscle/nerve. A shooting pain was running up and down the left side of my body so I automatically assumed I was going into cardiac arrest.
Every time I get any kind of ailment, I automatically go into panic mode and I start mentally writing my will. Unfortunately for my friends and family, all I'm going to leave them is a bunch of bills but that's another story.
Anyway, last week I had my first (and my last!) root canal and was put on antibiotics. I don't like antibiotics. It does a number on your body (for most people) and if you're not careful, you can become immune to them, if you take too many.
I've been on antibiotics before so I know what to expect: side effects. This time, my side effects were worse than ever before. I feel nauseous, grouchy and sleepy, among other things. So, this morning, instead of going to the emergency room, I called my dentist and he said "just stop taking them. The infection is, most likely, gone,". I'm sorry but 'most likely' isn't good enough for a hypochondriac. I have six more pills to take so do I take the rest and deal with the side effects in a mature manner or do I stop and hope 'most likely' means I'll never have to go on antibiotics again?
I'll keep you posted......isn't this engrossing?
