Sunday, January 13, 2008

A New Year and a Familiar Problem

Another Christmas and New Year's have passed and I'm left wondering what's it all for. When I say 'all' I mean the entire holiday season. Are we still under the impression that we are celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ? Are we still living under the illusion that as soon as the year goes up, things in our life will get a whole lot better?
The great thing about New Year's resolutions is that most people know they will fail at them so they don't look down on others when they fail at theirs. ;)
My New Year's resolution is to lose weight. Original, right?
Just before Christmas I had my yearly physical. I knew I would get a lecture from my Doc about my weight but I wasn't prepared to hear what she had to say. She used the 'O' word on me. Yes, obese. There! I wrote it! Not only did she use the 'O' word, she also politely handed me a voucher for a Weight Watchers membership. Oh, did I mention that my Doc is about 110 pounds? I pictured myself shoving donuts down her throat. That was fun.
Anyway, I know I'm fat but I didn't think I was obese. Afterall, isn't obese a word to describe those fat people that are at least 100 pounds overweight living naked in their beds? Well, I'm wrong.
According to our BMI (a simple and widely used method for estimating body fat which calculates your weight by your height) below are the classifactions of 'fatism':
A BMI less than 18.5 is underweight
A BMI of 18.5–24.9 is normal weight
A BMI of 25.0–29.9 is overweight (this is where I am but I'm creeping up to the next level!)
A BMI of 30.0–39.9 is obese
A BMI of 40.0 or higher is severely (or morbidly) obese
A BMI of 35.0 or higher in the presence of at least one other significant comorbidity is also classified by some bodies as morbid obesity (this is where the naked people living in their beds fit)

It's funny how some people (like me) struggle with food their whole lives while others couldn't care less about food. They are the morons that stay thin forever without having to workout or cut out the good stuff. I'm sure we all have had a friend or family member in our lives that are like one of these skinny assholes.
I once had a roomate that was tall, skinny, blonde and stupid--the guys loved her. She could eat and eat and eat and didn't gain an ounce. She wasn't bulimic either. Trust me, I watched her closely as I was completely mesmerized by her eating (not to mention drinking) habits. Now, that was a skinny asshole.
Below is a photo of us (circa 1996) from the Sears portrait studio.

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